Today is Saturday -the day I usually tackle an entry in my lie journal. I sat down to my computer with every intention of doing that, but you know what? I’m just not feeling it today. I’ve done a lot of emotional heavy lifting this week, digging into some pretty sore spots in my psyche. I think I’d rather just take a mental time out and reflect on all the good things going on right now. All my victories.
- I was taken off blood pressure medications this week. Thanks to my ketogenic diet and daily Shakeology I am down 61.5 pounds. I’d say that’s winning.
- I wear real clothes. Every day. This sounds like a given but at the height of my depression I stayed in my pajamas 24/7. You know what? I haven’t worn pajamas in the daytime since April. I’d say that’s winning.
- I shower regularly. Sadly, this was too much of a chore to even consider most days a year ago. Just keeping it real. Welcome to depression folks. But now, I’m squeaky clean. I’d say that’s winning.
- I can go to the ugly places inside of me. The scary places. The painful places. I can go there and feel the feelings and not wind up curled up in some corner in a puddle of tears and despair, but actually feel them and find healing. That’s huge. I’d say that’s winning.
- I am writing this blog. Opening up. Letting you in. Being vulnerable. That has never come easy for me. I’d say that’s winning.
- I am excited about my future. I’m enjoying life. I’m not just living in the past and waiting to die like I was a year ago. I actually felt that way–like my life was already over and nothing good was going to happen ever again. Now I know better. I’d say that’s winning.
- I believe that I matter. That’s something new for me. I’d say that’s winning.
Listen, I’ve got a long way to go still. Years and years of damage that needs repair. But I know I’ll get there. Look how far I’ve come! I’m a conqueror! I’m winning. Just like Charlie Sheen.
No, in all these things we were more than conquerors through him who loved us. Romans 8:37